Those fairy tales of prince charming and his delicate darling riding into the sunset often leaves you with a question mark. Did Cinderella love her prince as much after she realized he liked to dig his nose? Did Snow White want to remain married to the man who didn’t want to take on the responsibility of changing diapers? How exactly did their “Happily ever after” turn out? Let us take it from the guy’s perspective. Did Cinderella turn out to be a nag asking the prince to not throw wet towels on the bed? Did Snow White spend a bit too much on her online shopping to leave the prince wondering if she had some false notion on the exact contents of the royal treasury?
Men do realize that marriage comes with some added responsibility but the extent of it can make them rethink the whole notion of why they got married in the first place. It is true that you can’t marry someone to change them but both of you will need to change to keep each other happy. Here are some things men love before marriage and but hate soon after.
Taking Time To Get Dressed:
Men love the fact that a woman dresses up for them. During the dating phase, they don’t mind the little extra time women take to don their sexy avatar. But the same thing becomes a big pain point after marriage. They don’t need the hours of dressing up. Just the right lingerie to do the job.
Going all gooey-dooey over your man is fine during the lovey-dovey stage. But men want to best treat this as a phase. Overdoing the baby talk in a mature relationship can be a sign of not growing up. The other ‘baby talk’ of wanting to have a baby as soon as you get married is a problem too. Men know they’ll be tied down when the baby comes so they want to take it easy with a little time for themselves before they can plan a family.
Too Much PDA In Front Of Friends And Family:
OK. So you are married and in love. But displaying that to his boss’s extended family during a formal dinner may not be such a good idea. Neither would it be appropriate to mention such things online on social media which may well include each of your professional circles.
Long Phone Chats:
Am sure you both loved spending hours on the phone trying to even interpret silences. Once you are married, your man knows that he is coming back to you at the end of the day. There really is no point gushing for hours over the phone, is there!
Marrying The Family:
The adage still stands that when you marry someone, you marry their family too. And just like you may not like all of his family, he may not like yours.
The Small Things Can Drive You Crazy:
Don’t throw your wet towel on the bed. Leaving the toilet seat up? Don’t dig your nose. Honey, can you clean the dishes? None of this is said with a constant need to nag you – only a way to make you realize that you need to take a little ownership of your end of the bargain. And you’ll feel the same way once you stop looking at is as a nag and thinking of it as an opportunity to show your thoughtful side.
Using Sex As A Bargain Chip:
Sex isn’t a commodity or a way to get what you want. One of the best things of being in a marriage is the liberty of having sex when you want and how much you want. If you, as a woman, use it to control your marriage, your man will eventually be put off with the whole affair and worse, look for other means to fulfilling his desires. Sex is a basic human need – yours and his. While “making love” may not be your exact priority when you have a baby sleeping next to you, do it as a way to keep your bonding close. And never use the “If we have sex, will you…” line.
You need both hands to ring a clap. Cut down on the nagging and try to understand things from your man’s perspective. Put yourself in his shoes before you criticize and you’ll be in a much better position to reach a middle point compromise.